Episode 20 – How Do I Build Courage To Take That Big Step?

How do I get the courage to take that big step?  

Hi, welcome to this episode of the place to be free podcast. I’m  your host Martha Blessing and today I am diving deep into the fourth “C” which is the fourth step from my methodology on how to create health,  healing,  and transformation in your life.

This methodology comes from my own personal journey, in my life…going from, really quite honestly, being lost, confused,  addicted, and broke,  you name it.   My life was incredibly different 30 years ago.   And trust me when I tell you if I could heal, and make these transformations,  anyone can… because this methodology,  number one?  It  works, and it works for everyone.  I have coached countless numbers of women and students and clients to use this method and change their lives. 

And you know initially they would come to me for healing physical symptoms,  but what happened in the process is their whole life changed and improved, because they used these tools and these methodologies… 

They are the 5 c’s of health healing and transformation. 

I’ve gone through the first three already in other podcast episodes. And I’ll leave a link to those episodes in the resources section so you can go back and listen to those.

But just real quick they are: getting to the core cause,  which most people never do.  That’s one reason why they’re stuck.  They’re trying to find solutions when they haven’t actually gotten to what the core cause is.

Number two is clarity. You have to get clarity.  And it is clarity about how you got where you are, which is the cause.  And you have to have clarity for where you want to go.  Because if you don’t set a destination,  you can’t get there. 

If you don’t place your order, the universe and intelligent substance cannot go to work on delivering it. 

The third one which is clearing, and I will come back to the different stages and possibilities for clearing in more of the upcoming podcasts,  but for now there is one episode about clearing energy. 

Really it’s transforming energy.  We don’t clear energy,  we just transform it.  We transmute it to a different frequency so clearing really isn’t the correct word. But I go into that in that episode, so I will leave those in the show notes in the resources on the website for this episode.  And so moving forward we’re talking today about courage and oh, holy cow like without the courage you won’t get there.

And I can’t tell you oh, well let’s put it like this most people want this formula that is going to get them to courage. They want a formula that is going to take away all risk, that is going to take away all personal responsibility, and that is foolproof. Guess what folks? That does not exist. And the fact that this is what most people are looking for when they’re trying to find a solution is what actually keeps them stuck in the same place in the recurring pattern. Because they are not in a, well number one, in energy pattern and energy signature of trusting themselves. So they’re giving their power away to something outside themselves , but they also have never learned to build and really truly understand what it is to build courage,  or how it works or how it happens.

So that is what I’m talking about today. How do we get this courage? Where does it come from? and there’s a very interesting sort of sidebar in twist to that because, as you may have either heard or read in in listening to this podcast or maybe you’ve been on my email list and read some of the articles are blog post that I have written over the years I don’t think I’ve actually talked about it very much but literally I was 28 years old I was an adult had been out of my parents house and living on my own for 10 years I honestly had no idea how to make choices and decisions for myself.

So it might sound kind of silly or ridiculous but I really just got bumped along and went with the flow right because I was raised in a very controlling environment and a very codependent environment. And honestly you know it was my mom’s way or the highway. She made every decision. She decided what schools I would go to.  What hobbies I would have and I didn’t know any better. I thought that was normal and she would sort of twist it and  sugar coat it with this…. I just want the best for you.

So I got sent to private schools and I did sports and I was a competitive figure skater, all these things. And then I got shipped off to a woman’s private Junior College in Missouri and let me tell you… that it all pretty much fell apart after that because I was footloose and fancy-free. And I’m not going to lie. I made some really bad choices and decisions back in those days.

So my point to all of this is that we are literally trained I believe from an early age to follow the rules, perform according to our parents expectations, and we do that because we want love and approval. It’s not even a conscious choice or decision really. We are just going with what brings us the Safety and Security and love and attention to meet our needs as little kids.

And we really don’t we’re not encouraged to have an original thought or to break out of the familial or ancestral or societal Norms that are programmed generation after generation.

So what’s so fascinating about this idea of Courage is and some of you may or may not know this but I have been a I’ve been a psychic medium since I was about six years old. I have been a sorcerer since that age and an empath so I have been tuned in to frequencies and dimensions in this life that quite honestly seemed pretty unusual to me as a child oh, so I just kept it all quiet.

But as an adult I spent several years early in my healing career as a registered nurse and I was a medical medium oh, I could see hear and feel the mental emotional and spiritual causes of the physical illnesses all my patients in the hospital end in the facilities where I worked.

So for  years I really thought well that’s my gift and I need to  bring this forth for people and I did. I used to do a fair amount of intuitive readings for people. But when I owned my brick-and-mortar businesses I had a lot of psychic mediums that were independent contractors that came in and every week regularly and consistently and did readings for  people for customers.  I began to see what a disservice it was because people were giving all their power away to these psychics and mediums.

They were never learning to trust themselves to have the internal fortitude and a skull with stamina to trust in intelligence substance oh, God / Source whatever you want to call it, To trust in that and to develop their internal power source to make choices for themselves if they’re coming for readings and wanting someone else to tell them how their life is going to go.

Once I started being witness to this I had to stop it immediately because it was so disempowering and I also thought so much of this was dark.  Quite honestly I’m just going to say it was bullshit.  Some of these people were not of good intention, very fear-based and negative. And I feel incredibly blessed that I have always known the truth capital T truth and and seen what really God in light infused intuition looks and feels like versus manipulation or ego-based. so I was able to just put a stop to all of it and that’s part of the reason why I sold the brick-and-mortar business is that I did. 

You cannot create courage intellectually. You cannot create courage from your mind. You can’t think your way to courage. Which is what most people try to do. In order to create courage, you have to take actions. and you have to be willing to fail.

You have to be able to step into the expansion of what is trying to come through you oh, and if that doesn’t get you where you want to go, you have to be willing to dig a Little Deeper and keep asking your higher self how to get where it is you want to go.

And I’ve said this before you cannot have a desire without the ability to fulfill it. And that is one of the biggest things that helped me along the way learning that from one of my mentors was I have this desire for a reason there’s a way for it to happen in no matter how many times I fall down by God I’m going to make it happen, and because of that I never quit.

But in the beginning I had no idea what courage felt like because all I did was doubt myself or follow the path somebody else told me to follow. Which is what most people do. it’s what we’ve been trained for by our parents and by our culture and Society.

So one of the first things they teach people in my 5 Steps to Freedom program end course which by the way I will leave a link to that on the show notes and I do offer mentoring with that course to help you move through it and to stay accountable and stay on track because in the beginning you don’t have a support system and you don’t have the courage and it’s all brand new it’s a new way of thinking it’s a new way of being and it feels scary and confusing so I do offer that line train to help people move through it.

One of the  first things that I teach in that course is how to get still long enough to number one make a significant shift in your energy and get you out of your head and into your own energy into your body so that you can feel your intuition and start to trust it because without that you will never develop the inside and the courage to trust yourself.

It’s also a way to shoot your energy out of the constant mental loop. The brain and the subconscious mind go in the fear loop, the anxiety loop, and it short-circuits the stress response, the fight or flight response.  By learning to do that and it really is a practice that’s all it is. It’s just a new way of being. You can’t get it wrong. The only way that it doesn’t work is if you don’t do it , which is like everything else. If you don’t brush your teeth that doesn’t work right. You can’t just stare at your toothbrush.  You’ve got to pick it up and put the toothpaste on it to brush your teeth everyday.

That is a habit that you have practice because it was taught to you from a young age. 

Developing courage is the same way. you have to take a stop you have to take action, and then you have to realize and recognize that you are enough the world is on your side oh, the field of intelligent substance is constantly creating it wants what you want it wants you to experience what it is that you want, or you would never have had the seed or the idea planted in you to have it.

So the means to achieving it is there but you have to develop the courage within yourself be willing to make a decision, be willing to have it go wrong, and then be willing to learn and grow from a place of non-judgment and nonattachment. be willing to just look at the facts and look at the truth in the situation and then make course corrections, to move in the direction that will get you the results that you desire.

But what happens for most people and I see this all the time is that they have one bad experience and they put a judgement on it, an attachment to it.  And they decide that they are that experience and they are bad… they’re not worthy… they’re not good enough.  They screwed it up and that’s it. They stop because the subconscious mind has convinced them that they’re  failures. 

When we talk about courage, what we’re really talking about is having the courage to think and believe differently about yourself and about life. what we’re really talking about is examining what is the truth about a situation.

When I started my brick-and-mortar businesses I had no idea what I was doing and I didn’t know what I didn’t know. And I tried to get some help in the areas that I felt I was the weakest that I needed support. I had no idea really how to manage the books and to do profit-and-loss statements and there are all sorts of things I had no idea how to do it so I had to learn those things and I had to hire people to help me. I had to learn marketing. I had to learn advertising. There were so many moving pieces. And it was overwhelming in the beginning. And every single day I felt like a failure. I felt just so dumb, because there were so many things I didn’t know. 

 

And I had a story going in my mind about how I wasn’t good with numbers.  And here I was working with big dollars and numbers every day, all day long. And I definitely made mistakes. Now I had a friend in my life at that time that was really quick to kind of point out that I didn’t know what I was doing. And quite honestly that person’s not in my life anymore because I didn’t need someone to tell me that. I already knew it. And that was not going to help me build the confidence or the courage that I needed to keep moving forward.

The truth is we live in an amazing world despite the fact that it looks like there’s chaos going on all around us.  There is  magic going on all around us in the field of intelligent substance, and we literally truly can have anything that we can think about and dream about.

It can be created and manifested from this thinking intelligence substance. Whether it’s health, well-being, or healing.  You know that’s part of the problem.  Why people don’t get better. they’re staying stuck because that’s what they’re focused on and they’re going to doctors and giving their power away instead of trusting their bodies and tuning into what it is that will help them. 

So here is the transformational take away from this episode and that is to understand what courage really is.  Courage comes from taking an action with the intention of expansion and growth and being willing to accept that something may not turn out the way that we planned.  But knowing and trusting that we’re going to be okay.

Most people, they’re not willing to take that risk and so they won’t ever build the courage they need to build their dreams. I just got to tell you like there’s so many people who are entrepreneurs or independent contractors who leave their jobs and have no idea how it’s going to turn out.  I think what is it they said about Colonel Sanders? I mean there’s a story I forget how many things went wrong and happened to him before he had success selling chicken.  We see these kinds of stories all the time. 

Courage comes from not knowing what’s beyond the next 200 feet in front of you and learning to evaluate and course correct. You will never build courage if you are always learning to get your answers from someone else. If you are waiting for someone to tell you how you should live your life, or asking a psychic how things are going to turn out. 

Quite honestly  it is actually impossible to truly predict future events. It’s impossible to do because they are only reading a certain point in place in time, a specific point in space and time. and there are just too many variables because the field is always bringing into manifestation according to what we’re observing so at any point in time there’s too many players in the game, on the field, and too many variables based on people’s thoughts and intentions and energies and frequencies.

When I had my store I used to have a booth or a table at a lot of the different health fairs and spiritual life Expo type events and I listened to a psychic, as I was walking past her table going to the to the restroom and she was using tarot cards and she was reading, doing the reading for someone, on her business… okay, and you know if Tarot, if that’s your thing fine. I don’t want to insult, to hurt anyone’s feelings but I’m just conveying it in this conversation, she was using tarot cards, she was doing tarot and she turned over some cards and she said no this isn’t the year for you to really grow your business.  this isn’t the year for you to accelerate your growth and that’s going to happen 2 years from now oh, so in the meantime you should focus on… and blah blah blah blah…. she went on,  as I  walked past but that was the gist of what I had heard. 

And I thought to myself oh my God how disempowering this is, allowing someone to tell us when we are going to be successful in your business or any other area of life. Or getting a reading about your health and they tell you, no,  this isn’t the year for your health so don’t bother trying.

Do you see what I’m saying here? You will never build courage and Trust if you continue to look for answers outside yourself from someone else.  and try to have them tell you how things are going to go. And I learned this really early on in my business because I was just literally handing over thousands of dollars to people saying show me how to do it and I never learned until I took the responsibility to get the courage to be willing to have something go the wrong way and then learn how to course-correct it. 

So your takeaway is for you to take a look at where you are giving your power away? Who are you giving your power away to? Where did you learn this pattern? Is there someone in your life who is controlling and taking away your ability to Intuit for yourself what is the right Next Step. Is this a pattern in your family?  Were you raised this way with someone who was controlling? Someone who was a dictator?

And who would you have to be in order to develop courage? What would you have to do?  Would you have to develop self-worth or self-esteem?  Will you get that if you don’t take the steps?  If you don’t do something out of your comfort zone? 

 

 So take a look this week at where you feel stuck, where you would like to develop courage, where you would like to trust yourself more.  And ask yourself what steps could you take? One single step, a baby step, 1 step forward. That would move you closer. So that you can get out of this energetic pattern of fear of failure.

And I also want you to spend some time if you have a Stillness practice do it in your Stillness if not maybe you Journal but to reflect on this idea about fear because it’s important to listen to that voice of fear oh, but when you do this time I want you to think about how many times have you listened to that voice of fear in the past? And answered it’s call,  where has it gotten you?

So many of us have been there listening to that voice of fear I know that I did and quite honestly the voice of fear and taking that path it’s the easier path. That so many people walk because our families, our parents and our society and culture trained us to take that path. 

But if you’re listening to this podcast you want to create change and I’m going to encourage you to learn instead how to listen to the voice of inner knowing that’s calling you right now that’s your heart that’s your soul. When we don’t listen to that voice that’s what creates illness and anxiety in our bodies.

Will you choose to develop the courage to show up for yourself? to do the work and do something different to create something different. 

In the next episode I’m going to be diving into the last and final step in my 5 step methodology, Core Values. You’ll find out what they are and why they are so important to your success and accountability, for creating lasting change and transformation in your life. 

If you want help with developing courage and your own personal power and energy signature oh, this is one of the things that I help students and clients do in my 5 Steps to Freedom course end program. It gives you the five steps, the methodology that I have used and taught to countless numbers of clients and it’s available over on the website at www.Marthablessing.com/fivesteps    

Thanks for listening to this episode. If you found it to be a value please share it with anyone you feel would benefit from this. and please be sure to go over to Apple podcasts and leave a review the  more reviews that we get the more people will be able to hear the podcast and the more lives that together we can change and transform. I’ll see you in the next episode.