Why Working Through Your Feelings Is A Trap – Episode #23

Episode #23 Why Working Through Your Feelings Is A Trap

00:00:00 – 00:05:01

Your body knows how to be healthy. I’m your host, mark the blessing, and this is the place to be free podcast, a show that is passionately devoted to illuminating the potential within you, we’re shaking up and breaking up old paradigms so you can free up your mind and body to create profound well-being and a ridiculously happy and successful life. Hi, welcome to this episode of the podcast in this episode. I am unpacking and talking about why working through your bad feelings is a trap. That’s a pretty bold statement. I’m going to explain why I came to this. How and why I came to this. Why I think it is so vitally important for people who are looking to heal and transform either their physical health or their mental health and well-being or any area of their life where they’re having a recurring pattern and even in relationships. I’ve been doing this work for many, many years, several decades in, I get a lot of people that come to me for healing, a physical ailments, and also they’ll sign up for breakthrough Sessions, and most of the time they know that there’s a connection between their body and their mind and their emotions. There’s somewhat aware about the law of attraction, metaphysical healing, maybe a little bit about universal laws or mental science. And they have an understanding or an awareness, at least, that they have somehow created their situation or their challenges or their problem for themselves, but they can’t seem to figure out how to get out of it. 99% of my clients have had some kind of trauma in their lives. Some kind of abuse. And quite honestly, I mean, let’s face it. It’s pretty safe to say that pretty much everyone has had at this point in their lives. What they would consider to be some kind of trauma, when people come to me, they start maybe with a discovery session, discovery call, they want to get to know me, find out how I work, or what’s my specialty, something like that, or they just start out they book a blind spot, breakthrough session. To get to the core cause of their symptoms or issues that are keeping them in these recurring patterns that they don’t want to experience in their life anymore. Now here’s what’s so interesting and what’s so fascinating. Most of them have been to therapy. And I am not dissing or bad mouthing therapy. It has its place. But what happens is by the time they come to me, they have been in therapy or they tell me that they have gone to therapy. And what’s happened is because they have had an experience with their therapy of not being able to free themselves from anxiety or depression or whatever seems to be troubling them. Repeated relationship patterns. Feeling unlovable feeling unworthy. They doubt that I can help them, or that their life, their well-being, or their symptoms, can actually change because they haven’t changed so far. They’re still stuck. So in their mind, based on their perception of the past and the past results, they have drawn a conclusion that it can’t be fixed and they can’t be helped. But they’re still hoping they’re still willing to explore, but they’re doubtful, right? They’re coming to it with the energy of doubt and fearful anticipation. Desperate almost. I have to say, unfortunately, right? There’s an era of desperation is she’s my last hope, can it work? Well, here’s the thing. Number one, the first thing I tell them is, therapy is for talking about your past.

00:05:02 – 00:10:01

Working through your past hearing and mentoring is about creating your new future. We don’t focus on the past. Now why is this? I’m going to give it to you from an energetic and a universal law perspective about why working through your bad feelings is a trap and what I mean by that. Let’s break it down. When we look at the law of cause and effect for every thing that you are experience, there is a cause. This is science. Universal law is science. What creates in the field of intelligent substance in the quantum field, what creates the effect, is the cause and the cause is being who you are being energetically. And I’ve talked about this in other podcasts. So if we’re being fear, if we come at therapy from a fearful place from a trauma place, also from giving our power away, to the events that have happened, we are continuing to be that fear. And from that we are going to have particular thoughts from a fear frequency and so we can only take actions that are going to result in the same frequency because that is who we are being, how we get trapped when we try to work through our bad feelings is that we’re keeping ourselves stuck in the energy of the past and what happened to us in the past. What our subconscious mind does, trying to keep us safe from experiencing this kind of trauma again or similar feeling of trauma is, it’s like this homing device that continues to look for the same pattern over and over and over again that your subconscious mind will recognize. So if you continue to talk about your bad feelings, how bad you feel from this relationship then ended or someone that dumped you or how you were taken advantage of or your illness, I’ll give you an example of that in a minute. Your continuing to feed your subconscious mind, the opportunity to keep you stuck in that pattern. Because this is what it does. This is what it looks for is a familiar pattern. Much of the work that I do with people is breaking down that pattern that identity that you’ve created and the pattern that goes with it, which is all just energy. Remember that this is all just a these are thoughts. We have cemented it. So every time you go to therapy, every time you try to unpack your bad feelings, you’re talking about your bad feelings. And you’re just cementing it in your subconscious with your thoughts and your energy. How we flip it, how we switch it, how we transform it, is to get into a better feeling and energetically, which is a different frequency, and that way you shake up the pattern, granted in the beginning, your subconscious mind will still have a quite strong pull. That’s why it’s so important to be consistent and to practice practice practice. I give students and clients the tools, it’s magic, but it’s not magic. You do have to show up. Because you are responsible for the results and the reprogramming and the rep pattern. But that’s the good news. When we continue again, as I said, to go back to this default about how bad you feel. In ruminating in your head in your mind, over and over and over again about the thoughts from I always say midnight yesterday ended at midnight. It’s over. You can not go back and change the events. What you can do is change your thoughts and your feelings and emotions about them. I want to give you an example of that.

00:10:01 – 00:15:08

So I have a client that I have been working with in the beginning, she had a lot of resistance. She kept wanting to tell me she kept saying, I need you to hear me. I need you to tell I need you to hear me when I talk about my past. And she kept wanting to talk about it consistently over and over again. The resistance happened because I told her that it didn’t matter. Not that she didn’t matter that her past didn’t matter because we were not going to continue to revisit it, that we can’t create a new future. From being your past self. And it might sound kind of harsh, but let me reassure you, I have lived through tremendous amounts of trauma. I lift her sexual abuse, I live through a lot of events in my life that were traumatic. Continuing to focus on them was not the key to getting out of them. Ever. At any point in time, this client felt that I really couldn’t help her if I didn’t understand where she had come from. Where she had been. The truth as you are not, the things that happened to you, you are a sovereign, energetic, spiritual being, and those were just events. I’m not saying they weren’t painful. I’m not saying they didn’t leave you feeling crappy. They do. But you are not those events. And you are not your thoughts. You are not the thoughts that you think about those events. Except, when you think those thoughts repeatedly and they are negative emotions and negative feelings, you’ve now created a pattern within yourself within your energetic self within your being, your spiritual energetic being, that it is a particular frequency of vibration, everything is vibration and energy, the frequency is determined by the emotions and the feelings and the thoughts that will repeat consistently about Bose events. And here’s the truth about it. She told she has told and that she had a horrific things happen to her in her life. I will absolutely not deny that. But she has told several people in several therapists for many, many years about her life over the last 72 years. It did not help her get better. She still had the illness. She still had the anxiety. She still had the fear. She was still living in it, creating a belief that she was dirty and ugly because of these things that happened to her, which is absolutely not the truth. So we iterating it in therapy did not change the vibration, the frequency, or her experience of it. It didn’t get her out of it. Now, since we’ve worked together, she is out of the resistance, and she has learned and she is repatterning, reprogramming, and creating an entirely new life and frequency for herself and the illnesses are starting to leave her body. One by one, because she sees them for what they are, illness is not a problem. It’s actually the solution. And so she seems now she can step back and see that it hadn’t served her to continue to talk about these. Bad feelings that actually kept her trapped. And it kept her experience saying that remnants of all the events, because it keeps her attached to the identity she created when those things happened to her. I’ve done a couple of podcasts and talked about identity. Our old identity are stories. So it keeps what happens is when we ruminate in our bad feelings, it keeps the subconscious mind honing in to pull us back into that frequency back into what it recognizes. In the energy of that identity in that world, who we were living as as that being. There will be very clear. You can’t create a new life. You can’t become a new B ing on the inside, which is where everything is created from in the law of cause and effect.

00:15:09 – 00:20:02

If you’re being fear if you’re being the program of trauma, that’s what you are frequency on the inside so you can not become a new being, a healthy being a well-being that is free from the energy and frequency of illness or lack or scarcity or old patterns of not good enough and unlovable, you can not create new from that old trap from that old pattern. It keeps you hiding in shame and it keeps you hiding from yourself and from the world, like you can not find your assets, your spirituality, your sovereignty, if you keep going to that place with those bad feelings. So the way out of your bad feelings, this is a transformational takeaway from this episode is to reach for a different thought, reach for a different experience and that is the opposite of what you are experiencing. And when you do that, you create a new neural pathway. A new energetic frequency for what it is you want, the opposite of what you’re experiencing and you create this new frequency within yourself. You create it inside yourself first, and you continue to do it and repeat it over and over and over again. So that you become it on the inside and then everything on the outside lines up with that being. Now you can see the law of cause and effect, the cause is your being a different person in the result, the effect that will manifest will match that. What do we do in the modern western world? We will focus on a diagnosis and what’s wrong. And they play that over and over and over again. And they cement it into their identity and they’re being that is one of the things that I talk about in my book. Healed an unlimited and it’s one of the things that I talk about consistently and teach people in my 5 steps to freedom course because I never accepted a diagnosis. That’s one of the very first things you want to do is eliminate using the words I have with any kind of diagnosis. I never the day that doctors told me I had fibromyalgia. It went in one ear and out the other. I never, ever. Repeated those words. In my entire life. And I lived in ten years of daily chronic pain. I never said those words out loud. And even when I would go back to checkups and things and somebody would say, oh, you have fibromyalgia. I see and you’re I said no, I don’t. And I saw it so seriously. I said, no, I don’t. I would not allow them to keep me trapped in the bad feeling of owning that. And letting it be cemented into my being into my core. So that’s the first thing. And I mean, I get it. It’s scary sometimes. I have had numerous experiences in my life. Fortunately, being having been a nurse, I have a lot of information. I’ve had numerous times where I’ve gone to a physician to a doctor when I had really excruciating pain, I knew that it had the nature of a neurological pain like maybe her needed this or carpal tunnel or something like that, right? Like I knew those words and those labels and those diagnoses and I could go in and I could talk to them and I could clearly tell them energetically this is what I’m feeling. But and I would even go for testing because why I wanted to do that was I wanted to know like what disk level is at the set. I’ve got energy that’s trapped here. I want to know what disk level this is at. So I can literally go in and observe it in my body and start creating a new pattern and a new story. That’s how I utilize what western medicine has to give us. But never ever did I stay in that diagnosis? In that pattern, I always took a step back. I never accepted what they said. I just would say, okay, thank you.

00:20:02 – 00:24:57

And I’m going to think about this. Before I would ever agree to anything, because I would work to clear it first. In my own body of my own being and look at what are the points of agreements? Where did I agree to have this energy become out of balance and congested in this area of my body? How and why did I agree to do that? Where are my story? Why am I stored? And so you can move towards it. And yes, I might have a bad feeling. I might have emotions. But the way out, as I said, is to create a new story, a new pattern, and so one of the ways I teach people to do that is say, you know, my mind says this because it’s just a trap. It’s just our subconscious mind. It’s just a story. My mind says this, but I say, and I change it to what I want my experience to be. And so you can start to do that right now right here today, whatever is going on in your life, whether ruminating over and over again about how bad you feel, you can say, well, my mind says, I feel crappy about this experience that I had yesterday. Where someone hurt me in offended me, but I say, I know the truth, this wasn’t about me. I don’t take things personally. They’re just having their experience. They didn’t set out to hurt me. If there’s any number of ways that you can reprogram this. To it becoming the experience that you do want to have the frequency that you do want to experience. And then you repeat it over and over and over again. Like I said, it’s a practice. Most people aren’t willing to do the work. They aren’t willing to show up and repeat until they’ve created a new pattern because they get pulled off. And with all due respect, this is what the world teaches us to continue to stay in these negative patterns. Look at the news, look at everything we’re exposed to. It’s teaching us to stay in the woe is me. And to ruminate in these bad feelings, and to give our power away and think that we have absolutely no choice to change that, right? All of these commercials for medications here in the U.S. here in the states. Every time you turn on the television, there’s a commercial for pharmaceutical drug. Okay, so your understanding is and why I made that statement that it is actually a trap to continue to focus on working through your bad feelings. It will not serve you. I’m not saying don’t feel bad. Don’t focus on them. Remember that what you’re feeling? Is energy? And you have the ability to move energy, that is your true power, your internal power, your energy being, and if you don’t know how to move the energy, go to the website, get some of my free guided healing experiences and meditations that teach you and show you how to move the energy, two of them there. On my free gift page, also there’s a course unlock the missing piece that teaches you and goes in depth how to do this. There are numerous numerous people in programs to teach you how to move the energy, and that’s all it is. Your feelings and your emotions are energy. The issues are in the tissues. They get trapped. Anxiety is nothing more than energy moving in the body. You have it long enough and it doesn’t move and you stuff it back down. Yes, you will have physical symptoms. But it is nothing more than energy. Okay, that’s it for this podcast. If you found value in this podcast, please share it with someone who you think might benefit from listening. And I would appreciate it so much if you would go to iTunes or apple a podcast and leave a review if you found a benefit from this podcast. The more times you share this or write a review, the more people I can help step into embodying being a well person. That is my path that is my purpose. Thank you for listening. Thank you for being here. And I will see you in the next episode. Thanks for listening to the place to be free podcast. And if you liked what you heard, then you want to know more go to Martha blessing dot com forward slash freestyle.